computron

/kom'pyoo-tron"/ 1. A notional unit of computing power

combining instruction speed and storage capacity, dimensioned

roughly in instructions-per-second times

megabytes-of-main-store times megabytes-of-mass-storage.

"That machine can't run GNU Emacs, it doesn't have enough

computrons!" This usage is usually found in metaphors that

treat computing power as a fungible commodity good, like a

crop yield or diesel horsepower. See bitty box, Get a realcomputer!, toy, crank.

2. A mythical subatomic particle that bears the unit quantity

of computation or information, in much the same way that an

electron bears one unit of electric charge (see also bogon).

An elaborate pseudo-scientific theory of computrons has been

developed based on the physical fact that the molecules in a

solid object move more rapidly as it is heated. It is argued

that an object melts because the molecules have lost their

information about where they are supposed to be (that is, they

have emitted computrons). This explains why computers get so

hot and require air conditioning; they use up computrons.

Conversely, it should be possible to cool down an object by

placing it in the path of a computron beam. It is believed

that this may also explain why machines that work at the

factory fail in the computer room: the computrons there have

been all used up by the other hardware. (This theory probably

owes something to the "Warlock" stories by Larry Niven, the

best known being "What Good is a Glass Dagger?", in which

magic is fuelled by an exhaustible natural resource called

"mana".)

[Jargon File]